i'm engaged.

:) :) :)

La la la!

I cut off most of my hair!
It looks amazing. It feels amazing.
I've been teetering on this decision for several months now.

The boys in my life always tell me "no, no, no. don't cut your hair,bee. girls always look better with long hair" Blah Blah.

But not my boyfriend.
He's been telling me for weeks that if I want to do it, then do it.
And you know what? He likes is WAY better than before. ;) Sah-weet!
He thinks that I look "out of his league" now. My reply, was to laugh...and completely disagree. But it was sure nice to hear such a huge compliment. *beams*
I like it so very much!

However, I am still in Anchorage...and that means I am camera-less.
So pictures will be posted when I am back in Girdwood for worky work.

Anyway. Life has been good.
I miss Milo to death.
Other than that. Everything is okay.
I'm most definitely in love.
Ryan and I are so fucking happy together.
I haven't posted much about him or us in here, because I didn't want to jinx it.
After this month though, it's safe to say that we are very happy. And this is a serious thing.

So yes. Life carries on.
I'm happy in my own world and I hope that it stays that way. :)

you don't even KNOW.

holy shit, batman.

work is pretty lame today.
i've just been dicking around. it hasn't been too busy.
and i've spent the entire morning counting down the hours until my shift is over. haha.

i just want to drive to anchorage to see my lovely boyfriend.
i miss him!
we have a really good thing going.
and i'm enjoying the hell out of it. :)
it's been one of those click things where we just fuckin' fit.
sigh. it's amazing.
annnnnd, i get to spend the next three days with him.

plus i'm getting my ink touched up...and taking my friend with me for his first tattoo! yayz.

so the rest of my week should kick some serious ass. :)


happiness is a warm gun.

So my mom called me today to tell me that she and her husband were in a really bad car accident last night.
FUCK.
Someone ran a light, hit them from the side...they went skidding. Rolled the car a few times down an embankment. !!!!
God. I'm so relieved that she is okay.
How scary.
She has some head trauma. Neck injuries. Broken rib.
Fuck.
I wish I could be there to give her a hug and try to take care of her a bit.
She refuses to take the pain meds because she doesn't like how they feel. Sigh.
Apparently her husband walked away from it without a scratch.
Anyway, that scared me. A lot.

Sigh.

so hillary clinton is out.


obama all the way! :)




awesome!

i hate forcing myself to eat.
sometimes that's what it takes though.
my stomach hurts because i'm so hungry...but my mind just does not want to eat.
some of my friends have an E.D. as well, so it's not much help when i spend time with them. sigh.
oh well.
i'm forcing myself. trying not to gag. :/

on a completely different note...
i have been SO HAPPY lately.
my therapist is going to be impressed when i go to see her tomorrow.
hooray!
i didn't have the horrible two weeks of depression this month.
i've discovered that by surrounding myself with awesome people...staying super busy...staying positive...and enjoying life really all make a huge difference in my life.
and as much as i LOVE LOVE LOVE milo to death. it has been a nice change to have some time to myself. i have never been away from him for more than ten days before now.
i miss him so much. i think of him constantly.
but i know that he is loving his time with his dad and grandparents.
whenever i talk to him on the phone, he is thrilled. :) it's precious.
so all of my worrying about that was a bit silly in retrospect. thank goodness.

other than being awake for 48 hours and not really recapturing necessary sleep before work today...i'm in a pretty good mood.
of course, i'm not thrilled to be at work. but it's so damn chill that i really don't mind it at all. so that's a huge plus.

tonight, i will see him again.
that makes me even happier.
it's nice when a simple thought about seeing someone can put a smile on my face. :)

well, lunch break is over.
back to work!

xo

oh, life.
you crack me up, sometimes. :)

Alright.
I went camera happy...so here is an assortment of pictures of the new tattoo.
I LOVE IT. :)
My friend, Matt Burch, drew the design up for me.
He is an awesome artist. Much love to him for doing it for me.
Inked at Primal Instinct Tattoo in Anchorage, by my fave artist, Jeremy.

( CLICK! )


Comments would be lovely. :D

new ink!



looks rad!



pictures to be posted soon!



tomorrow?

this is going to be a goooooooooooood night.

i'm over my sickness. *happy dance*

i'm dressed like a school girl. i feel cute. ;)

i'm in anchorage with the boy toy.

we rented a killer movie....

and uh, yeah. i think tonight will rock the casbah.

xo

i'm so irritated right now.

i'm still sick.
been in bed sleeping for days.
and not at work making money.
i'm broke as fuck.

i've been trying a few different "natural" remedies for my affliction.
i think they have been a bit helpful...
mostly, i'm just way past annoyed with being sick. it's been five days now? UGH.
hopefully the combo of the natural remedies mixed with the prescriptions will kick this shit out of my system.

also...i miss milo SO MUCH.
i've been really sad about not having him around.
i hadn't heard from jeff, either. so i had no idea where they were or anything.
finally, i got in touch with them.
and jeff is being kind of a douche.
telling me that i will see milo when it's convenient for him and his work schedule.
until i reminded him that our court paperwork hasn't gone through yet and to work with me.
so his idea of working with me is to plan something that is great for him and crappy for me.
he is driving 7 hours tonight with milo to come see me.
they will get here at 3 in the MORNING.
then i have to work an eight hour day.
so i won't be able to see milo all day.
i'll see him a bit at night. (when i was originally going to be in anchorage, so long date plans....oh well...)
then a bit in the morning before they leave because jeff has to be back to fairbanks, 7 hours away, by sunday morning.
ugh. thanks a lot, douche-bag.
although this is his idea of a compromise.
originally he was trying to say that they would just come back the second week in june. UMMMM, hello...since when is it okay to make an agreement that milo wouldn't be gone for more than two weeks and then stretch that into a month and think that i could be bribed with a gift card to make up for not seeing my SON for a month?! are you kidding me? Ugh.

sometimes people irritate me SO much that i can't even deal with it.

so...fantastic...my house isn't milo-ready. i'm still sick. and now i'll be awoken in the middle of the night. and i'll hardly spend any time with my son.
sounds like a fan-fucking-tastic compromise, eh?

*grumble*

i am uber sick.

with something completely yucky.

i want to die.

instead, i shoved a garlic clove up my twat.

because the chemical fixes just aren't cutting it.

old wive's tail, please be true.
fix me, garlic clove.

awesome.
having the ups and lows that i do can be a real challenge sometimes.
that last entry was weird.
i was in a super good week. having a super good time.
but then i freaked out, worrying that everything good would go away.
things are back to happy-land now though. so that's nice.
i am just letting go.
and enjoying the time and energy spent with him.
we are having wayyyyy too much fun.
and i might be going on a road trip across canada and the US with him.
he's being transferred to georgia...
so if the army approves the time to drive, i'm going to do it. :)
i love making impulsive decisions that guarantee fun.
it keeps things random. :)

and work is going so well.
i seriously like my new job.
it's fun. and the people i work with are fun.
also, working at the mercantile lets me meet new people. and get to know the other member of this rad little community that i live in. rock on.

and i got no illusions about you
guess what? i never did
when i said, when i said i'll take it
i meant...
i meant AS IS.

oh good lord.

i am SO HAPPY.
my life has been pretty much awesome for the past week.
i LOVE it!! :)
good things have been happening.
i have been meeting super awesome new friends.
i have started my new job.

life is fuckin' good.

*happy dance*

don't you? DON'T YOU???

Yep.
I was feeling a bit full of myself and decided to take a few pictures of my new hairs.
I had my hair cut a bit, plus I refreshed my colours. (red and purple)
There is a bit more purple this time around.
I am quite pleased.
Only, I wish I had the patience and time to straighten my hair the way my hairdresser does.
She is pretty fuckin' rad.

Check it...
( VAIN )


xoxo

My doctor said that chowing down on chocolate could really help my Endometriosis, so I followed his advice.
A shit ton of chocolate later...
I would have to conclude that he's right.
And I would like to note that PMS-ing women burn 500 EXTRA calories a day. So...your chance to eat delicious chocolate is now. EAT up!
Take up space.
Don't conform to the societal standards that glorify anorexic figures.
That's bullshit.
Women were not meant to look like pre-pubescent little girls for all of adulthood.
We have curves for reasons.
And not just for a purpose.
Curves are sexy as hell.
Ask any mature guy. He'll tell you.
That college geek at the bar doesn't know jack shit.
So fuck him. And any other disillusioned asshole who tries to tell you or SELL you otherwise.
The doctor said to eat chocolate.
Love your body.
Love yourself.
Te T'aime.

...to Fairbanks.
For the weekend.
With him. And the band. :)
My excitement is hardly containable.
I feel so happy and lucky and liked. Eeek!

I'm totally going to call off of work for this maneuver. Bwahaha!
Fuck it. It's the last weekend at the bar anyway.
And it's some festival that is going to be packed as hell...
I'm pretty over my job for the season.

My new job is already lined up.
It's an office job.
Seems like it will be totally manageable and enjoyable too.

So that's it then.

A weekend away with him and the band.
Before they leave to tour the lower forty-eight for six weeks. Boo.
It's actually awesome for them, though.

Anyway, I'm excited.
Road trip! (6-8 hours of beauty!)

xoxo

life is good today.

that's how i must take it.
day by day.
and the past few have been magnificent.

spending time with this new friend has brought much joy into my life.
he is a musician.
and he will be leaving to tour again in a few weeks...
but for now, i will enjoy him.
and us.
and this new friendship that we have discovered. :)

peace!

Oh. My. God.

This was a GOOD weekend.

:) :) :)

I am so happy right now.

Scared, but happy.

Tonight, I'm hanging out with a very rad [fucking hot as hell] guy. A musician.

Eeeeeek!

I can't wait.

*happy dance*